snowy Sunday

[kindkit]

I'm at home, in domestic mode (have made dashi, will be putting a loaf of bread in the oven soonish, also Cleaning The Bathroom OMG), and a little bit bored.

So: ask me anything! Fannish, personal (including any questions about my trans-ness), philosophical, political, my favorite color, whatever. Nothing is automatically off-limits, and I promise not to be offended by any well-meant question. I may choose not to answer or not to answer in much detail if I find it's a tricky subject for me, however.

Anonymous questions are okay if you feel the need. (Well, they're okay on DW. On LJ I've disabled anonymous comments due to spam, so come to DW if you want to ask something anonymously. This is assuming I can even post to LJ, of course.)

Comments

Re: It's cool if I'm actually too late to this party.

[kindkit]

he also describes himself as cisgender (gender matching body, because innate gender is the only thing that determines gender, therefore a dude's body is a dude's body no matter what it looks like). I like that.

I'm glad that this is his experience, but it's very much not mine. And I'll admit that I get a little frustrated/discouraged at the way this is held up to trans* people as the attitude we ought to have, as though somehow we're letting the side down otherwise. I want to change my body. It's my goddamn body, and getting an attitude from (some) other trans* people of "if you want to change your body it's because you're not well adjusted/don't have the right political attitude" that amounts to virtually the same thing as what one gets from unenlightened cis people ("how could you want to mutilate your body!") is really. not. helpful.

I don't mean this as an attack on your friend (whose relationship with his own body is none of my business) or on you. But, please be aware that your friend's experience is not everyone's, and some trans* people, including me, suffer a lot from dysphoria and the misery of being stuck in bodies that feel wrong to us. My calling my body parts by different names or pretending they're the shape that would feel right to me doesn't help. At all.

Re: It's cool if I'm actually too late to this party.

[lemposoi]

Oh, he changed his body too, and completely agrees with you (although he would never refer to any part of his physique as female, no matter what it looks like). He often has said pretty much exactly what you just said.

I really didn't mean to offer an opinion, I was just talking about the interpretations of cisgender and transsexual that I've been exposed to. Uh, though I did say that I liked the idea that a transsexual person is/can be/can still identify as cisgender, that transsexual and transgender are/can be interpreted to be different things in a sense, or can be seen as different things. I mainly like it because it's so precise in meaning. I'm a sucker for that sort of thing. It doesn't mean it's the One True Way (like I'd know even if there was one).

I know trans peeps don't always agree. Some fully embrace and are empowered by terms that would make others feel dysphoric and miserable. I try not to get involved. It's none of my business, and even with best intentions I'm likely to fuck up due to innate cis fail.

Which I may have done just now by insisting on talking about this as if I know anything. I'm sorry. :(