rage

[kindkit]

If any of you who have me friended agree with this secret from today's fandomsecrets, would you please defriend/unsubscribe me now?

Especially if I have you friended/subscribed/granted access back.

I don't want to associate with people who think I'm a liar who's just pretending to be trans in order to get male privilege.



(No, I haven't resumed reading fandomsecrets. But I saw this linked to, and foolishly followed the link, and now I am simultaneously enraged and horrified at the possibility that the OP, or one of the agreeing commenters, could be someone I know.)


ETA: My head aches and I'm tired, so I'm going to crawl into bed with a book. I mention this so you know why I won't be answering comments for the next 12 hours--it's not that I don't appreciate your support and general coolness.

Comments

[dingsi]

... whew, I'm glad I'm not alone in this. Seriously, I read those blog posts and such where people said "but when I dreamt I was always [true gender]" and positioned that as a valid detail to suggest transness (because of the [false] assumption that your subconscious can never lie to you] and I felt like a failure. I used to beat myself up over it or feel doubtful and confused whenever I dreamt I was female without also hating it in my dreams.
Of course, I also dreamt of being male sometimes. Or flying. Or the apocalypse. *shrug*

[kindkit]

Or the apocalypse

Yeah, I have tons of dreams that are about my anxieties, not my desires. So the fact that right after I bought my first men's clothes, I had two different dreams about wearing dresses . . . that's not my subconscious telling me I'm not trans, that's fears working themselves out.

I am SO TIRED of the "I always knew" narrative. I mean, if that's someone's experience, great. Yay them! But it's so past time for that to stop being the normative kind of transness. I'd love to see people who are in a place of relative safety (not, for example, in danger of losing access to medical treatment if they don't tell the right story about their identity) talking openly about having gone through uncertainty and self-doubt.