something queer going on

The bad: I work in a grocery store and I'm tired. And I want to punch every customer I see buying 10 cans of tuna and 20 cans of beans, or wearing goddamn gloves and then coughing into their hand in the checkout line, or who complains that we're out of stock of something or that we have new temporary policies like "no reusable containers."

I also am being constantly misgendered by customers and it's making me tired and furious and very, very depressed. The worst part is that I don't think they're doing it on purpose; that's why it's such a kick in the self-esteem. I literally do not know how I could present more masculine short of actually shaving my head, but I still get "ma'am" ALL THE FUCKING TIME. I'm binding, I'm in men's clothes as I have been for years, my hair is short and in a masculine cut, I wear no makeup or jewelry, and none of it does any goddamn good. Today, exhausted and stressed, I had to leave the sales floor and sit and cry a little. I wish this fucking testosterone would start having some visible fucking effects.

Dear cis people: you do not need to use gendered honorifics. It's usually pretty easy to avoid them! In particular, you do not need to use them on people who are clearly not presenting as the gender you have decided they are. Just stop. Stop. Stop.


The good: Not sick. Not unemployed.

Have acquired all the Mechanisms albums from Bandcamp. Last night I listened to their earliest one, Once Upon a Time . . . In Space, and enjoyed it. It's like the Decemberists at their most folksy/weird, only more so. I have a feeling I may like the later albums better, as OUaTIS feels very much like the work of a group finding its feet, but it was still full of Tragic Fun.

It's weird to hear Jonny sing. I know Jonny isn't Jon, of course, but it's still weird. Jon, I suspect, does not sing, even though his voice would be pretty good if he tried.


Okay, signing off now as my dinner is ready.

The day before yesterday I introduced a work colleague to The Magnus Archives. (Yes, I am shamelessly seeking out opportunities to tell people about it.) She was interested, so I played the first episode for her while we worked, and she loved it. She has a long commute and was excited about the prospect of something cool to listen to.

And my innocent act of evangelism seems to have brought down a curse upon us. That evening, while driving home, my colleague was in a minor car accident (not her fault, no one hurt, insurance taking care of damaged car). The next morning, while I was taking my walk, as yet unaware of colleague's accident, I stumbled over an uneven sidewalk and fell hard. My glasses flew off but fortunately didn't break, I hit my head (which I didn't realize until considerably later, when I looked in a mirror and saw a little dried blood on my forehead), scraped and bruised my knees and my hand, and bruised some ribs as well.

I'll be fine but I am quite sore. I blame the city for not maintaining the damn sidewalks better, and Jonathan Sims for his cursed creation.

Colleague is somewhat surprisingly still enthusiastic about TMA, and said things like ( slight spoilers for early episodes under the cut )


In other Rusty Quill-related developments, I have some thoughts about things in Rusty Quill Gaming through episode 37, "Ups and Downs," but mostly about 34, "Gai Paris," ( under the cut )

TMA re-listen continues. Through episode 56, but with spoilers for all aired episodes ( under the cut )

I've re-listened through episode 36, "Taken Ill," but under the cut and in the comments there are likely to be spoilers for everything through the end of S4.

( Open up this intriguing book you found at Oxfam )

I may have just ordered a Magnus Archives t-shirt.*

I virtually never buy merch, but (a) this is a show I actually want to promote, and (b) it's not a well-funded corporate production, it's a bunch of folks who still work their day jobs. (Which means they take amazing storytelling risks on all kinds of fronts, because they don't have to worry about pissing off the funders.)

I also started supporting them on Patreon a little while back (maybe around the time I finished S1?), but I think I'm going to up my support from $2 monthly to $5.

(*There are unofficial shirt designs that I actually like better, but I wanted to support Rusty Quill, rather than people who are breaking the terms of TMA's Creative Commons license by selling fanart from which Rusty Quill won't get a penny. This is not a thing I care about with corporate media.)

Relistening to TMA S1, and I've just caught on that all three of Jon's assistants are named after classic horror writers: Martin Blackwood, Sasha James, and Tim Stoker.

( A further reflection under the cut, spoilery for characterization )

Now that I'm caught up through S4 of The Magnus Archives, I'm cautiously looking forward to reading some fic and would be grateful for recs.

( Details under the cut, because spoilery )

Have now listened to episode 159. ( Sort of a spoiler )

Spoilers for TMA through episode 154, "Bloody Mary," ( under the cut )

Very brief Magnus Archives reactions, with ( spoilers through episode 144, Decrypted )